Tuesday, November 1, 2011

The Tuesday XI: Movie Monster Edition

Since you’re likely still recovering from your Halloween hangover (be it candy-induced or otherwise), we thought it’d be a good time to stick with the scary theme and bring you our own monstrous line-up. We figure a team like this ought to be a nightmare to play against, so we’ve lined them up in an old school, catenaccio formation, which you can find a primer on here.
Here’s our side:
GK – Michael Myers – No shot ever fazes him. Neither does getting stabbed, set on fire, thrown out a window, dropped down a mineshaft, decapitated, or nearly anything else.
SW – The Mummy – A little slow now as age has caught up with him, but he’s still able to keep our defense tightly organized.
Sorry Benecio, this Wolfman.
LB – The Wolfman – Transforms from a mild-mannered defender into a ferocious attacking force down the wing.
CB – Jason Voorhees – Our big lumbering man-marker that you’d have to go into outer space to shake, and maybe not even then.  
CB – The Great Pumpkin – Has a talent for keeping opposing players occupied, even if you don’t really notice he’s there.
DM – Dracula – Sucks the life out of opposing attacks with his timely tackles and knack for interceptions.
CM – Freddy Krueger – Lulls defenses to sleep with his deep positioning and short passing before unleashing a killer 40-yard pass  
RM – Slimer – Wreaks havoc all the way up and down the right wing. You’ll need a proton pack to have any hope of slowing him down.
LW – Jack Skellington – He may cut inside too much as he’s caught between his role as a winger and his desire to be a forward, but his long legs and nimble footwork mean he’ll succeed however he plays.
Deep-lying forward – Norman Bates – Famed for using his head fakes and movement to disguise his true intentions before slipping a dagger-like ball through the defense.
CF – Frankenstein – Our towering target forward didn’t have a good head on his shoulders, so we found him a new one and bolted it on. 
About “The Other 87 Minutes”

What is this new site we’re exposing you too? We’ll let them explain:

The Other 87 seeks to provide something that’s not instant analysis or eve of matchday previews. Think of us as the good bits of your favorite soccer coverage: the profiles that examine what makes a certain player tick, the historical background that sheds some light on how the sport has evolved to the present day, the silly features that are more than just tacking names on a list, but considering and explaining why each one deserves to be there.
O87 wants to be a home for soccer writing that makes you think, but that also treats the game as just that, a game. The greatest game, the one we obsess over and fixate on, to the point where we can’t read that gas costs 3.43 a gallon without thinking of Ajax’s 1995 Champions League winning team. But a game nonetheless.
“When you play a match, it is statistically proven that players actually have the ball three minutes on average. The best players – the Zidanes, Ronaldinhos, Gerrards – will have the ball maybe four minutes. Lesser players – defenders – probably two minutes. So, the most important thing is: what do you do those 87 minutes when you do not have the ball…. That is what determines whether you’re a good player or not.” -Johann Cruyff

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