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Last summer, eleven new breweries opened in Colorado – if it’s not in the top three of your beer-cations, it most certainly should be. But if you’re not drinking inside the state, it’s rather difficult to get beers from the up-and-comers. So grab 400 Pound Monkey, a perennial offering from Left Hand, who celebrate their 20th Anniversary this year. This is a beer for those who are tired of the West Coast having control over the entire country. English-style IPAs say no to over-hopped, over-citrus, over-long bitter lingers. This beer focuses more on balance, using biscuity malts to counteract the herbal hops.
Just like the Colorado brewing scene, the Rapids have brought in new blood – and their focus this season is much younger, with the majority of the team clocking in around the 24 year mark. Oscar Pareja’s built a team that’s set to attack and, supporters hope, get themselves back into the playoffs. Alas, that attack meant little in the match against Dallas, when back-up ‘keeper Steward Ceus gifted a goal to Jackson in the 11th minute. The Rapids players looked gassed, out of ideas, by the end of the match.
Only time will tell if it was nerves or if Pareja’s expecting too much.
Planting the Seed of Soccer Across America: Danny Beerseed - 0 comments
By Jerry Jimenez / Black Army 1850 and American Beer Vigilantes
It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. Somehow that seemed like the best way to start this. OK, I should be original. Change, change, and more change. Whether it has come in abundance, or it has lacked, change has become a constant with this club. After the club fired Robin Frasier his sophomore season as head coach, Chivas USA finds itself on its eighth head coach in its eighth season, putting José Luis Sánchez Solá in the driver’s seat and twenty-seven players riding as passengers. No one is really sure if Sánchez Solá has some sort of map, but all of the faithful goat fans pray he isn’t using Google maps. That “short-cut” may lead him to crash this car into a wall and achieve a repeat of the 2012 season. (Don’t Drink and Drive)
The trip begins enthusiastically and hopeful with an undefeated preseason. Returning players, Miller Bolaños scored an impressive six goals in eight preseason games while Jose Correa scored five. Newcomers to the team, Eric Avila and Giovani Casillas also looked impressive during their time on the field. The Goats finished their preseason with a total of six wins and two ties. Not bad for a new group of kids attempting to mesh as a unit.
With an average age of twenty-four, Chivas USA has been thrown into the fountain of youth and completely refurbished with a few veterans and many newcomers to the league. Players like Joaquin Velazquez and Walter Vilchez will have to show the young ones that age is nothing but a number. Our captain, Dan Kennedy, has his work cut out for him once again and lets not forget about Juan Agudelo. I truly believe this team is one that knows it has something to prove. It has a whole lot to prove and it is set out to do just that. This definitely feels like a “make it or break it” year for the Goats. Only one thing is for sure, this season will be way more fun to watch than the last.
A little Red for the Red and White! Comparing this beer to Chivas USA just seemed appropriate. I understand that most MLS fans don’t like my team. Yes, it feels like you haters want to “sacrifice” us to the soccer gods and rebrand, rebuild, relocate, blah, blah, and blah. I get it! It’s not easy being a Chivas USA supporter and only beer helps. You have to understand that, just like the Aztec Empire, we are not going anywhere…Oh, wait. Maybe that was a bad example.
Lets try that again and let’s talk cerveza; starting with the label, which reminds us of how our owner treats its fans, a dagger through the heart. This beer pours out hazy amber and settles into a deep ruby amber. I have to say the head on this thing is the best I have seen from any style of beer, ever; nice medium beige color to it. On the nose, we get quite of bit of hops and fruity tones. Some obvious malty aromas mixed in as well. It has some rich toffee, caramel, and roasted barley notes that get a bit of help from a well balanced bitterness. I’m an “IPA guy” and this is not too bitter, but bitter enough. One that will please the most experienced of craft beer drinkers but won’t push away newbies. At 7.6% ABV, this beer will sneak up on you and sit you back down on the bench unless you pair it up with some sort of grub. This is definitely how red ales are done on the west coast. If you can’t find this beer in Los Angeles, you may find it has “relocated” to San Diego. Cheers!
FC Dallas steps into 2013 lean, mean, and ready to cause havoc, and what is the local beer that best exemplifies this season’s squad? Iron Thistle from Rahr & Sons, made in Fort Worth. Both FCD and the brew have been steadily improving over the past several years. The club has been majorly tweaked this offseason with some major player additions, some major player losses, but a strong existing core, maintaining positive locker room chemistry. One of the major storylines during the Dallas offseason was the loss of Kevin Hartman as his contract expired with a club renewal. New import, Raul Fernandez, along with club stalwarts Chris Seitz and Richard Sanchez combine for a goalkeeping pool ripe for competition. Expect FCD to be strong between the sticks, no matter whose face you see. The defensive backline is back to its 2010 strength; expect to see warrior hops from our towering centerbacks, defending at MVP caliber. With above average strength, this FCD defense and Iron Thistle will be leaving people flat on their backs at the end of the night (ABV= 8%).
On the offensive front, you will see new signings Eric Hassli and Kenny Cooper alongside second-year hoopster Blas Perez. These big forwards will give David Ferreira new outlets and options to score. Like the aforementioned brew, FC Dallas’ stable of forwards will be the thorn in the side of your MLS defenders (especially Blas).
Rahr Brewing recently medaled for the first time at the 2012 Great American Beer Festival for Iron Thistle ale after years of hard work. The time has come for FC Dallas to get its due as well. Expectations are high for a great year as we kick off into 2013!
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Editor's Note: The 2013 Major League Soccer season is underway! You've read your season predictions, team-by-team capsules, and all sorts of talk on the state of American soccer. Season eighteen is an important benchmark as it passes the seventeen that the last attempt at professional soccer, the North American Soccer League (version 1.0), in the U.S. survived for.
And while you might be celebrating your side's first victory or scratching your head over their first lost... there's one thing that's been missing from all these early MLS musings... beer.
The San Jose Earthquakes were the best team in the league last year — maybe not in November, when the chase was on for MLS Cup, but certainly from March to October. After a promising preseason, when an eclectic group of newcomers and returning players slowly meshed together into something greater than the sum of their parts, the Quakes started the regular season off strong. For 34 games they put out a consistently effective effort that didn’t stop after 90 minutes, but went well into stoppage time. These, after all, were the never-say-die “Goonies,” and they rode their success all the way to the 2012 Supporters’ Shield.
For 2013, with the recipe for making the team settled upon, the Earthquakes hope to continue winning awards and making an impact in MLS. Starting off the season without a few key ingredients — most notably the twin towers up top Steven Lenhart and Alan Gordon — head coach Frank Yallop will try to tease some of the same flavor of play from the rest of the roster for at least a few nervous weeks. Something might not smell quite right at Buck Shaw Stadium in March, but no doubt by the summer the fireworks will be back on display.
A hard working, blue collar bunch, the Earthquakes added sparkplug forward Mike Fucito in the preseason. Following his three-stop international tour of MLS teams in 2012, Fucito lands in San Jose with a chip on his shoulder and a tireless energy to perform. Paired up top with defending MLS MVP Chris Wondolowski, who also arrived in San Jose after a similarly anonymous start to his career, Fucito will have every opportunity to make Quakes fans join the choir in singing his praises.
Little else changes for the Earthquakes this season — why mess with a good thing? — except for the target opposing teams humiliated in 2012 have put on their backs. After the disappointment of crashing out in the first round of the playoffs to arch rivals and eventual champions LA Galaxy, these Quakes see only winning MLS Cup as their goal. Get healthy, stay healthy, and play motivated, and the club could be celebrating their third ever championship by December.
Opening up a bottle of Pliny the Elder, an explosion of hoppy aroma bursts forth and fills the nose with a lusciousness that belies this double IPA’s smooth finish. Like a late match Goonies attack on an opposing defense, Pliny overwhelms the taste buds with a richness that lasts until the last drop. Quite intoxicating at a whopping 8.0% ABV, a couple rounds of Pliny will have you waking up the next morning with your head feeling like you just battled Steven Lenhart for 90 minutes. An award winner and arguably the best local brew in the Bay Area, Pliny the Elder is to beer what the Earthquakes are to MLS.
Planting the Seed of Soccer Across America: Danny Beerseed - 0 comments
Editor's Note: The 2013 Major League Soccer season is underway! You've read your season predictions, team-by-team capsules, and all sorts of talk on the state of American soccer. Season eighteen is an important benchmark as it passes the seventeen that the last attempt at professional soccer, the North American Soccer League (version 1.0), in the U.S. survived for.
And while you might be celebrating your side's first victory or scratching your head over their first lost... there's one thing that's been missing from all these early MLS musings... beer.
The LA Galaxy are back, and this time as two-time defending MLS Cup champions, but this isn't the same team you remember lifting the trophy back in December. David Beckham bid adieu and Landon Donovan's search for inner peace took him to Cambodia, while the team has yet to make a major signing (that's coming in July, bet on it).
So where does that leave LA? Still pretty damn good.
Omar Gonzalez, A.J. DeLaGarza, Todd Dunivant and Sean Franklin give LA the best back line in MLS and they're joined by new goalkeeper Carlo Cudicini. Put those five behind Juninho and Marcelo Sarvas and the Galaxy will be just fine, plus that Robbie Keane fellow and Mike Magee are still around, while Donovan will be back in April and a summer signing will come.
A new brewery just opened in downtown LA, Angel City Brewery, and they have an interesting IPA. The Angeleno IPA tastes like your run of the mill IPA, but it has something just a little different. Read the menu and you find out it's a grapefruit hop flavor -- a little bit of a change from an otherwise tried and true recipe for success, just like the Galaxy.
Planting the Seed of Soccer Across America: Danny Beerseed - 0 comments
Editor's Note: The 2013 Major League Soccer season is underway! You've read your season predictions, team-by-team capsules, and all sorts of talk on the state of American soccer. Season eighteen is an important benchmark as it passes the seventeen that the last attempt at professional soccer, the North American Soccer League (version 1.0), in the U.S. survived for.
And while you might be celebrating your side's first victory or scratching your head over their first lost... there's one thing that's been missing from all these early MLS musings... beer.
By Frankie Hejduk / FBM Spokeperson (and Columbus Crew Fan Ambassador and former USMNT defender)
With a good mix of veterans and youth, this Crew team has Columbus buzzing. The spine of this team is second to none with Arietta (9 goals), Higuain (5 goals, 7 assists), O’Rourke, Viana, Marshall, Berti and Gruenebaum all returning with a full preseason in tow. Defenses will be tested with speed and experience on the flanks by MLS ironman Eddie Gaven (9 goals) and the addition of ‘freaky fast’ Dominic Oduro.
The backline of Wahl, Berti, Marshall and Williams all towering over 6’2”, brings experience and size in front of last year’s saves leader Andy Gruenebaum. With service from free-kick maestro Higuain, set pieces will play a key role to this teams run at the MLS Cup.
Add a bench full of eager, young guns (Speas, Trapp, Findley, Meram, Sanchez and Tchani) and the MASSIVE chants will be in full effect down in Crewville.
Planting the Seed of Soccer Across America: Danny Beerseed - 0 comments
Editor's Note: The 2013 Major League Soccer season is underway! You've read your season predictions, team-by-team capsules, and all sorts of talk on the state of American soccer. Season eighteen is an important benchmark as it passes the seventeen that the last attempt at professional soccer, the North American Soccer League (version 1.0), in the U.S. survived for.
And while you might be celebrating your side's first victory or scratching your head over their first lost... there's one thing that's been missing from all these early MLS musings... beer.
By Mark Fishkin / Red Bulls season ticket holder since 1996, and the creator and co-host of the Seeing Red podcast (www.seeingredny.com). He also had WAY too much craft beer in Portland last weekend.
Hello Red Bulls fans. If you’re reading this, just like me you’re back for another Don Quixote-like quest for New York hardware in 2013. Of course, you know New York is zero for forever across all competitions, but there are quite a few reasons that this will be the year that the boys from Harrison, NJ make the right kind of noise.
Reason #1: Mike Petke
Much has been written about the 13th manager in the 18-year history of the club. Mike is the most earnest manager the MetroBulls have had to date. A legend among the fans, Petke is the embodiment of the franchise and all he was to do is win. As the club’s Scandinavian dalliance fades in the rear-view, Mike’s focus on hard work, a stalwart defense, and creative freedom for the attacking players may just be the recipe for success.
Reason #2: New Blood
On a team with a revolving-door roster policy (see: Dwayne DeRosario, 2011), the players brought in this off-season should stick around for awhile. Fabian Espindola provides the slashing, speedy runs that the club missed in 2012, and his 2 tallies at Jeld-Wen this past Sunday may make fans forget Kenny Cooper before too long. Despite Jamison Olave’s tough night, the 6’3”Colombian is no attacking player’s idea of a good time. Yes, he stood statue-like as Diego Valeri swept by him with a flourish on Sunday, but a solid pairing with Pearce or Holgersson should develop nicely. Juninho provides New York with a threat to score on any free kick, sparing Red Bulls fans of bad dreams of Roy Miller spraying balls into the 20th row.
Reason #3: Believing in America
Much has been made of Salzburg’s disdain for the young American player in MLS since purchasing the club in 2006. However, Red Bull Global Director of Soccer Gerard Houllier and RBNY Sporting Director Andy Roxburgh have made signing Americans a priority in 2013. Dax McCarty, Brandon Barklage, Connor Lade all won new contracts this offseason. Add late arrival Eric Alexander to Luis Robles, a recovering Ryan Meara, and veteran Heath Pearce and you’ve got a core of American players that will help the club go places.
Reason #4: DPs
Thierry Henry has scored 31 goals in 63 regular season appearances for New York to date. Guy’s the real deal, and despite is scowling and gesticulating, TH14 wants to win, badly. Really, badly. If Henry’s engaged & plugged in, the ball will be in the back of the net often in 2013. Tim Cahill has yet to click in New York, but if the man from Oz can get his head on a few Juninho free kicks, RBNY is going to be unstoppable up front. Then of course is the third DP that’s rumored to head to Harrison this summer. Will it be Kaka? Ronaldinho? The great thing about Red Bulls is that no one is too expensive for the club’s Austrian overloads.
As a nod to RBNY’s oldest supporters club, I’m going with the NYC-based Heartland Brewery’s EMPIRE PREMIUM. A Pils, this light, golden brew has a hoppy, grassy finish, and it’s perfect for the PATH train from midtown Manhattan to Harrison’s Red Bull Arena. Just remember to bag it up on the train!
Planting the Seed of Soccer Across America: Danny Beerseed - 0 comments
Editor's Note: The 2013 Major League Soccer season is underway! You've read your season predictions, team-by-team capsules, and all sorts of talk on the state of American soccer. Season eighteen is an important benchmark as it passes the seventeen that the last attempt at professional soccer, the North American Soccer League (version 1.0), in the U.S. survived for.
And while you might be celebrating your side's first victory or scratching your head over their first lost... there's one thing that's been missing from all these early MLS musings... beer.
The Montreal Impact are not the new kid on the block anymore. After a satisfying season where the club still decided to part ways with coach Jesse Marsch, the team from Québec is looking to Swiss Marco Schällibaum to guide them in their second season. Once again the Italian contingent will be key for the Impact. If Marco DiVaio, Andrea Pisanu, Matteo Ferrari and Alessandro Nesta can stay healthy and produce accordingly, then they will fight for a playoff spot. Also, key will be the play of central midfielders Patrice Bernier and Felipe.
With all the Italians in and around this club you don't really think beer when you think about the Impact, you think finely aged red wine. So why not go for a compromise and taste a barley wine. I would suggest the Solstice d'hiver (winter solstice in English) brewed by Dieu du Ciel. Just like the Impact this beer will wake you up with its strong taste and make you forget about our long, snowy and cold winters.
Planting the Seed of Soccer Across America: Danny Beerseed - 0 comments
Editor's Note: The 2013 Major League Soccer season is underway! You've read your season predictions, team-by-team capsules, and all sorts of talk on the state of American soccer. Season eighteen is an important benchmark as it passes the seventeen that the last attempt at professional soccer, the North American Soccer League (version 1.0), in the U.S. survived for.
And while you might be celebrating your side's first victory or scratching your head over their first lost... there's one thing that's been missing from all these early MLS musings... beer.
Don't worry we've got you covered.
By Andy Przystanski / Chapter President, American Outlaws: Adams (MA)
A fairly active offseason has given New Englanders reason to be cautiously optimistic. Recent acquisitions Andrew Farrell and Donnie Smith, as well as homegrown product Scott Caldwell all put in very promising shifts during the preseason. Revs fans will also keep an eye on the young Diego Fagundez, who is poised for a breakout year (in terms of goals and possibly dermatologically speaking—he is still in high school, after all).
Saer Sene, Jerry “Springer” Bengston, Juan Toja, Lee Nguyen, and Stephen McCarthy are other standouts on a surprising talented squad. Since Benny Feilhaber’s departure early in the offseason, Lee Nguyen has become the team’s marquee player. Arguably the most skillful, technically gifted member of the squad, the Revs will need him to have a great year if it hopes to make it into the postseason.
Heading into his sophomore year as head coach, Jay Heaps will hope to emulate the success his peers Ben Olsen and Jason Kreis had in their second years.
“This year will be different.” Being a New England fan is about keeping the faith in the face of hard times. Even without a big name signing or a soccer-specific stadium in sight, Revs supporters have the audacity to dream big.
The Audacity of Hops is an audaciously hopped Belgian Double IPA with an ABV of 9% and 70 IBUs. A meld of the quintessentially American flavors of a west coast IPA and the spicy complexities of a Belgian, the beer is a marriage of New and Old World tastes. Pair with a sharp, aged cheddar from Vermont.
Planting the Seed of Soccer Across America: Danny Beerseed - 0 comments
Editor's Note: The 2013 Major League Soccer season is underway! You've read your season predictions, team-by-team capsules, and all sorts of talk on the state of American soccer. Season eighteen is an important benchmark as it passes the seventeen that the last attempt at professional soccer, the North American Soccer League (version 1.0), in the U.S. survived for.
And while you might be celebrating your side's first victory or scratching your head over their first lost... there's one thing that's been missing from all these early MLS musings... beer.
Like most expansion teams, the Philadelphia Union spent their first couple of years looking for an identity. Now in entering their fourth season in MLS they seem to have found it under head coach John Hackworth. The Union are young, the youngest team in the league for the second straight year, with an average age of 22, predominantly American, with Hackworth stocking the squad with former US Youth Internationals and new addition Conor Casey, a man Honduran mothers tell their children scary stories about to get them to behave, and they increasingly reflect the blue collar nature of the city. Casey is joined by fellow new addition Jeff Parke, one of the best players Philadelphia has produced. The pride of Downingtown, PA and a star at Drexel University, the US International will replace departed captain Carlos Valdes. All-time team leading scorer Sebastian Le Toux will be suiting up for the blue and gold as well, after a year- long odyssey that took him from Birmingham to Vancouver to Harrison, and finally back to the banks of the Delaware.
With Freddy Adu sidelined with a terminal case of arrested development and salary inflation, the keys to the Union offense will pass to 2012 all-star Michael Farfan. A dynamic attacking talent who can strike as beautiful a cross as any midfielder in MLS, the U will go as far as he can take them. Another key player to watch will be third year goalie Zac MacMath. The former Maryland standout enters his second season as the undisputed starter in net, and will need a strong performance to get the Union back into playoff contention.
Like the Union, who used to be ruled over by a mad king, this Bavarian-style hefe is a mix of disparate flavors with an unexpected finish. One of the lesser known Victory beers outside of the Philadelphia area, as it is rarely bottled, Mad King Weiss plays with several different malt flavors, and a prominent clove presence, but has an almost pilsner like bite at the top. Very refreshing and a good post-game beer to celebrate a Union win.
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Editor's Note: Martin Luther King Jr. once said, “The arc of the moral universe is long, but It bends toward justice”. Sometimes we American soccer fans get wrapped up in the day-to-day, Monday morning quarterbacking (or centerbacking), knee-jerk reactions and miss out on the big picture. This weekly column will focus on picking out the larger themes and issues of Major League Soccer and the American game.
In the evolution of modern sport a league’s success was no longer defined by the quality of its play or by the size of its live attendance, but by how the networks–or more accurately the great national advertisers–saw it. For in American sports in 1980 there was no God but Madison Avenue and A.C. Nielsen was His prophet.
-David Halberstam, The Breaks of the Game
I’ve lost count of which numerical iteration we’ve all agreed that MLS has just entered (MLS 2000!), but I agree with the sentiment. Once again the league feels like it’s reached a threshold, readying itself to boldly go where...well, every other major American sport has gone before. More than thirty years ago Halberstam captured the moment in basketball history that American soccer, and specifically MLS, is preparing to embark upon now: Convincing a statistically significant percentage of the population to devote two to eight hours a week for 35 straight weeks (plus playoffs) to watching this particular sport on television.
If you spent any time on Twitter in the week before the season’s openers this past weekend then you likely saw at least some fragments of this discussion. This is the growth area now that attendance is becoming less of a worry across the league as a whole. (Though not, perhaps, for certain specific teams. I’d provide a link here, but I bet you’ve seen the pictures already.) To reach its manifest destiny by 2022, the league is going to have to start drawing more viewers, and thus more money, from television.
But if everyone agrees on the destination, then it seems very few can agree on the route to get there. Are higher ratings an inevitable product of continued growth, something that will come with time and sunlight and the continued TLC of hardcore fans spreading their interests to the masses? Or is there some kind of catalyst that can accelerate this growth, such as a marquee name coming over to one of the league’s biggest markets and...never mind.
To brainstorm the likely, or at least the most often-suggested framework for how this increase in viewers will come about is to take your brain for a ride into some kind of circular-logic Magic Roundabout of doom. In brief: More people will watch as the games get better, resulting in more money from television revenues, allowing the league to purchase or retain or grow in a secret lab (nestled high in the Cascade Range) a better quality of player, which in turn will make the games better, leading more people to watch. And so on and so forth; right round baby right round.
The trouble for the league, and those people who think that more can be done to improve it, is where exactly do you break this loop in order to inject your catalyst?
Do you raise the talent level over time by diverting a sustainable amount of money into development, allowing teams to bring in a higher quality of young, cheap players? Or do you encourage teams to spend first by raising the salary cap, bringing in (hopefully) better players and hoping that the resulting Quality → more viewers → more money, which will help some of the smaller market or more apathetic teams teams catch up either financially or competitively, depending on how quickly they started spending.
Or is there something that can be done on one of the other nodes? It makes sense that Quality would be the single biggest factor driving watchability, but it isn’t the only one. Some of those people who hike their big-boy britches up before asking “Why would I bother with the MLS when I can watch the best teams/players/global marketing conglomerates from around the world instead?” also willingly tune in to college basketball or football games that don’t involve their alma mater, which basically means they’re full of it.
Truth is, it doesn’t matter if they don’t watch because their delicate soccer palates can only handle the smooth flavors (like a lobster-mango ceviche) of Lionel Messi or because they’d rather devote their limited available sports-viewing hours to the ever-declining level of play put forth by indentured 20-year-olds being shouted at by men in hairpieces. Both of these are competitors with MLS for a limited number of eyeballs.
If the site you’re reading this on and its proprietors were really committed to growing American soccer, they’d tell you to deliver a six-pack to your buddy’s house an hour before the game, turn all the televisions in their house on to whatever channel it will be airing on, then go home and do the same at your place, perhaps stopping at the neighbor’s if you see a window propped open or a door ajar.
The point is that MLS got more fans into stadiums because some of those fans convinced others that the experience of being in the stadium, the atmosphere and the sense of speed and the copious amounts of beer available made it the best way they could spend their evening. Now MLS has to convince millions of more fans over the course of the season that the game itself is worth consuming, even if it is more double cheeseburger than ceviche.
About Eric
Eric Betts is a freelancer writer who lives in Austin, Texas with his wife and his dog Lando (yup). He is a contributing writer for "The Other 87 Minutes", their brilliance featured every Tuesday on the Free Beer Movement in the form of "the Tuesday 10" or the "Tuesday XI". While attending the Emory University he won "College Jeopardy"
Planting the Seed of Soccer Across America: Danny Beerseed - 0 comments
Editor's Note: The 2013 Major League Soccer season is underway! You've read your season predictions, team-by-team capsules, and all sorts of talk on the state of American soccer. Season eighteen is an important benchmark as it passes the seventeen that the last attempt at professional soccer, the North American Soccer League (version 1.0), in the U.S. survived for.
And while you might be celebrating your side's first victory or scratching your head over their first lost... there's one thing that's been missing from all these early MLS musings... beer.
2013 started off with another three points in BBVA Compass Stadium, the Houston Dynamo look to repeat again as Eastern Conference champs and make another trip to the MLS Cup. It won't be an easy run, as they take on Santos Laguna in the knock-out rounds of the 2012-2013 CONCACAF Champions League and start the group stage of the 2013-2014 Champions League later this year.
Personnel-wise, Houston lost Andre Hainault, Colin Clark, and the rarely-seen Josue Soto. Despite that, recent additions of Omar Cummings, Eric Brunner, Jason Johnson, Andrew Driver, the return of Mike Chabala, and homegrown Bryan Salazar, bolster the squad. Englishman Giles Barnes and Honduran Oscar Boniek Garcia both had a full off-season with the club after arriving in the summer, and look to build upon impressive performances. Both Calen Carr and Omar Cummings start the season injured, however, Cummings is slated to return by the summer and Carr hopes to be back in time for the post season. Dynamo legend Brian Ching will play his last season as a player-coach, looking to make the transition to assistant coach next year as smooth as possible.
With the slight weaknesses from 2012 addressed, and depth for Champions league added, the 2013 Houston Dynamo look yet again to be an MLS Cup finalist.
My beer pairing for the 2013 Dynamo squad is Karbach's Bourbon Barrel Hellfighter. Despite being a limited-release, this 10.8% American Porter still is a favorite to many in Houston, just like the Dynamo.
Planting the Seed of Soccer Across America: Danny Beerseed - 0 comments
Editor's Note: The 2013 Major League Soccer season is underway! You've read your season predictions, team-by-team capsules, and all sorts of talk on the state of American soccer. Season eighteen is an important benchmark as it passes the seventeen that the last attempt at professional soccer, the North American Soccer League (version 1.0), in the U.S. survived for.
And while you might be celebrating your side's first victory or scratching your head over their first lost... there's one thing that's been missing from all these early MLS musings... beer.
With new faces both new and veteran, D.C. United begins the 2013 MLS Season in a position unfamiliar in recent history. Returning to the playoffs last season after a five year absence and one uncalled red card away from hosting the MLS Cup, The Black and Red are amidst the list of teams to beat this year.
In the offseason, D.C. United has bolstered a roster captained by Chris Pontius and Dwayne De Rosario with the acquisition of young international players like Brazilian Rafael and Indonesian Alam Syamsir on loan. This year also sees Michael Seaton joining an elite squad of players cultivated from the D.C. United Homegrown Player System (HPS). He becomes a member of the First Team with other HPS alumni Conor Shanosky, Ethan White and Bill Hamid. Rounding out the young roster are established veteran players new to D.C., but not new to MLS, John Thorrington and Carlos Ruiz.
When I think about a D.C. United match at RFK, I think of the best tailgate in the MLS. With so many flavors in the shared dishes, a beer should be chosen that complements every flavor on my plate. In preparation for 90+ minutes of singing, jumping, cheering and celebrating, there is nothing like beer with a kick of spice. This Peppercorn Saison pairs exceptionally well with anything grilled and should happily be in anyone’s growler.
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Kick TV's Jimmy Conrad hung out with adidas's Product Manager Mike Walked to try on and talk about each of the 12 new shirts that Major League Soccer teams released during "Jersey Week" for 2013.
By next season each of the 19 MLS clubs will release at least one home, away, or third shirt every year. So get prepared for a lot of new and innovated designs (or hopef so... Red Bulls.....)
Planting the Seed of Soccer Across America: Danny Beerseed - 0 comments
The brave purveyors of beer in the name of American soccer, known more commonly as the Free Beer Movement, are joining up with The Beautiful Gear and Beertography for a once in a lifetime Soccer + Beer + Photography themed contest.
With MLS "First Kick" rapidly approaching American soccer is about to jump off to heights unseen. Beer, on the other hand, is never not awesome. So, the three of us decided to get together and put on a photography contest celebrating those two incredibly lush entities. All you have to do is send us your best original beer and soccer photographs.
To enter just follow @CarterTDaly, @FreeBeerMovement, and @Beertography on Twitter and tweet using the hashtag #CheersToSoccer. Whether you're on the pitch, tailgating, in the stadium, at the pub, or hanging out in your own living room we want you to share what you're drinking, where you're drinking and/or who you're drinking with.
We'll get together in a top secret location and select the THREE best entries that demonstrate the essence of beer and soccer to receive one of these incredibly clean "Pints Up!" Adidas X Free Beer Movement t-shirts. Three more honorable mentions will win a sticker pack from FBM.
So get to playing, watching, drinking, and photographing and get at us with your work. We'll announce the winners in two weeks time.
Planting the Seed of Soccer Across America: Danny Beerseed - 0 comments
Editor's Note: Martin Luther King Jr. once said, “The arc of the moral universe is long, but It bends toward justice”. Sometimes we American soccer fans get wrapped up in the day-to-day, Monday morning quarterbacking (or centerbacking), knee-jerk reactions and miss out on the big picture. This weekly column will focus on picking out the larger themes and issues of Major League Soccer and the American game.
The most frustrating moments in sports are the ones that fail to live up to the narrative we’ve envisioned for them.
This is different that the devastation of a crucial or undeserved loss. It’s the last-second shot rolling out of the rim, the field goal wide right, the team coming together in the second half only to blow it in the last week of the season. These storylines are how we process sports; when they’re thwarted the reaction is similar to a failed plot twist or a discordant note. And for that reason it’s a particular kind of disappointing for American soccerfolk that the U.S. men’s team isn’t living up to its destiny as the 1952 Hickory High School boys basketball team.
The expectation was that it would all suddenly make sense, that the first year and a half before qualifying got serious were Klinsmann’s Norman Dale moment, taking some early hits in order to lay down the foundations that would lead to future growth. The pupal constrictions of the team’s post-Bradley the Elder metamorphosis -- four-passes-before-you-shoot and Jermaine Jones and whatnot -- would after a time fall away, preferably via spectacular montage. All the lessons that had been learned during that time would suddenly become apparent; once we finished moulting, we’d have Attacking Soccer: unique and beautiful and capable of upsetting South Bend High in the state finals.
This is in all likelihood (hopefully) a temporary despair. With so few actual markers with which to gauge progress, the national team narrative feels like one of big swings. We’re the best we’ve ever been...ohh God, we’re not going to qualify. Deviations in form become breakthroughs and regressions. Danny Williams goes from Timbuk3 to Sex Pistols in a cap and a half. Jermaine Jones gets body swapped with Andrea Pirlo sometime over the winter break.
Those big gaps, and the big changes that occur within them, can be murder on the timeline of fandom, making every interval feel as though more time has elapsed than actually has. Ask anyone who covers the team how many variations of the “When will Johnny Footballer Be Ready to Start for the USMNT?” question he or she gets over the course of a typical week. (“I know he’s 18 now, but by the time Brazil gets here he’ll be 19.25! He should be an impact sub at least by then!”)
Because of its global reach, soccer has the largest and most sophisticated narrative of any sport on the planet. There’s the global ur-narrative -- Lionel Messi Lionel Messi Lionel Messi African Cup o-MATCH FIXING! -- built on top of a host of interconnected national and regional narratives that are themselves built on top of a host of smaller narratives: men’s and women’s national teams, lower divisions and young up-and-comers, cup competitions and derby rivalries, on the field, off the field, in the locker room and in the nightclubs, parking garages and personal fireworks testing facilities of some of the sport’s luminaries. At the center is the the league, the sports world’s storyline-generating World Tree.
To follow sports today is to be keep up with some combination of all of these narratives, harvesting the stories we think we’d enjoy and leaving others to wither and die. We pluck particular strings, follow certain conduits, construct a shelter that gives us our own frame of reference for viewing sports by blocking out the sheer magnitude of the narrative that we’ve decided we don’t care about.
It can be overwhelming, and in fact we’re so used to it being overwhelming that the relative paucity of new national team news has created those now-familiar overreactions to every new result and performance and led to the formation of a cottage industry in tracking the progress of Americans playing overseas. But no matter how many minutes Brian Sciaretta tells me Fabian Johnson is playing for Hoffenheim, I can’t help but tie it back to the question: What has he done for U.S. lately?
So it’s kind of a relief as an American soccerperson to once again have the familiar rhythms of the league-in-progress to look forward to, a statistically-significant sample size on which to eventually base the conclusions we’re going leap to after the first game (though why wait that long when there have been so many preseason opportunities). This year’s offseason has been perhaps the busiest in the league's history; now we get to enjoy the fruits of those labors. Some of the storylines we put our hopes in will thwart our expectations, but more will quickly pop up to take their place. What we’ll be talking about at the end of the season will be something we can’t even envision today.
Unless Jimmy comes back. Then we’ll have a pretty good idea.
About Eric
Eric Betts is a freelancer writer who lives in Austin, Texas with his wife and his dog Lando (yup). He is a contributing writer for "The Other 87 Minutes", their brilliance featured every Tuesday on the Free Beer Movement in the form of "the Tuesday 10" or the "Tuesday XI". While attending the Emory University he won "College Jeopardy"
Planting the Seed of Soccer Across America: Danny Beerseed - 0 comments
This is a case of beer. We are making an argument or case about something. See the connection?
On Friday, Toronto FC announced a major sponsorship deal with beer giant Budweiser for the upcoming Major League Soccer season. The five-year deal will give Budweiser and its sub-brands Bud Light, Stella Artois, Alexander Keith's and Michelob Ultra pouring rights at BMO Field, plus many promotional events in and around the stadium including tailgates and a new Budweiser "King Club" beer garden.
This is a disturbing move for North American soccer, which despite a league-wide sponsorship agreement with Budweiser, has been surprisingly open to the craft beer revolution going on in North America. In recent years, clubs such as the Colorado Rapids and FC Dallas have entered into deals with Coors and Budweiser respectively.
Meanwhile teams like Portland Timbers, Seattle Sounders, and Sporting KC grow closer to local craft beer brands to increase the mantra of "local soccer, local beer".
That's the natural extension of the Free Beer Movement way. Go local. Go local soccer. Go local beer. Go local economies. If you're making the decision to support live, local North American soccer you ought to be making the same commitment to local businesses. The more dollars we can keep in our communities the more we sustain them.
If you work in the front office of a North American soccer team that chooses this approach then you've decided that authenticity is a central tenent of your organization. That community, the people that live and work in the town, are your most important assest and they need to be embraced and their wants and needs respect.
As soccer pushes closer to the mainstream of our sports scene the siren song of "major sponsorship agreements" has and will continue to tempt the front offices of clubs around MLS. Obviously the league has already attracted dozens of major partners that pump millions of dollars into the game, but now the individual clubs are attracting interest from big-time sponsors as well; the ones that make the game-day decisions: the "party zones" fans will occupy before the matches, the "meet-the-player" events they'll attend in-between games, and, lastly, and most importantly, the beer they'll drink inside the stadium.
The biggest question of all is whether or not this deal is for the benefit of Toronto FC or any other North American soccer club in the long-term. Certainly TFC's partnership injects a much-needed marketing boost for a team with slouching ticket sales. Since their founding in 2006, this Canadian side has never made the playoffs. In season's past the TFC faithful have weathered this disappointing storm, but cracks are showing. Last season their average attendance dropped to 18,681 from 20,267 in 2011. On television, seat backs have been more and more common as Toronto slumped to dead last in the league.
If you worked in the front office of a team like Toronto FC would you look a marketing gift horse like Budweiser in the mouth? Would you choose the long-term "potential" revenue growth of building authenticity with your fanbase or the fast-track, short-term cash grab (especially as a team like TFC is hemorrhaging dollars at the gate)?
It's a tough call.
Consider the pieces of the TFC-Bud deal:
- Budweiser will launch a commemorative Toronto FC-branded Budweiser aluminum bottle at LCBO locations (Liquor Control Board of Ontario... where you HAVE to buy your booze) in the Greater Toronto Area beginning February 25 (An aside: If you're a TFC fan there's definitely some novelty in drinking a beer with your team's crest on it. But if you're NOT a TFC fan... what's the incentive to buy the TFC-branded four pack instead of, say, a plain, 30 pack? Surely there are few people who, in walking into their local LCBO, will spy the TFC Bud and exclaim "Oh my! We have a local soccer team? I never knew!")
- Having Budweiser "host a pre-game celebration at BMO Field with the Budweiser Big Rig (a mobile bar), live music and great giveaways"
- Fans will "enjoy food and beverages at the new Budweiser King Club at the North End of BMO Field"
- "For those watching at select bars across the GTA, Budweiser will extend the excitement with TFC prizing and giveaways for fans"
- Budweiser has committed to donating over US$350,000 to Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment’s (owners of TFC) Team Up Foundation, which funds charities that support children through sport.
The irony of Budweiser's approach is all of this is a Free Beer Movement wet dream. Each one of the elements of Budweiser's approach to marketing soccer through beer is the cornerstone of the FBM Philosophy.
With one, very large exception. Where's the authenticity? Where's the local connection? Why does this stink of a big, glossy PR campaign without a soul? This deal has all the style with none of the substance.
This isn't the direction we want for North American soccer. Given that MLS and the accompanying lower-division soccer pyramid is young we've got a unique opportunity. Given the intense amount of passion associated with soccer and for one's club we've got a unique opportunity. Given the relative small size of soccer and it's "nitch" corner of the sport-scape we've got a unique opportunity.
A unique opportunity to shape North American soccer in the proper way. The local way.
North American soccer is in the unique position of being built while our culture, as a whole, is at a crossroads, where one path leads towards the "big box" approach: bigger, louder, inflexible, more santized OR the "local" approach: community-based, responsive, innovative, risk-taking, more subtle... kind of like how most would describe soccer as well.
Instead of locking itself in with Budweiser because they throw a good party with bad beer TFC should be looking to partner with craft breweries (and other local businesses) like Steam Whistle, Bellwoods Brewery, Junction Craft Brewing, Kesington Brewing Company, Great Lakes Brewing Company, Amsterdam Brewing Company, or Mill Street Brew Pub (thanks to several people on Twitter for the Toronto craft beer recommendations). The point is that there are over a dozen of craft brewers in the Toronto area that Reds fans most likely have an authentic connection to (and make a decent brew) and could partner in some capacity with their local team.
Yeah, none of these breweries could park a mobile "big rig" bar in the BMO Field parking lot or produce branded TFC aluminum bottles, but they certainly would communicate the idea that local and quality is a paramount focus for the here, now, and future of Toronto's soccer scene. That's something, especially in dire times for TFC's fan base, that they'd like to hear.
Ultimately that's what North American soccer should be about. A fan bleeds his or her local colors and they damn well should be able to drink a local beer in their stadium.
Planting the Seed of Soccer Across America: Danny Beerseed - 0 comments
Editor's Note: We'll have more on these newly released supporter's beers in the future (and hopefully some samples), but here's some information to whet your whistle.
Press Release:
Gorilla Football Collective (GFC), an official supporters group of the Seattle Sounders FC, has partnered with Big Al Brewing and Dick’s Brewing Company to bring two distinct, craft beers to the 2013 soccer season. GFC, a 501c3 with a charitable emphasis, enjoys giving back to the community through its “CIVic Ticket” program, community service projects and fundraising events. Proceeds from both beers will benefit Gorilla FC Charities.
Big Al Brewing created for Gorilla FC Civ’s White IPA which is made using American Two Row, Malted Wheat, Unmalted Wheat, Oats, and given bitterness and aroma with Nugget and Cascade hops. This beer was designed with balance, flavor, and drinkability in mind. A refreshing wheat beer, with a unique Belgian character, balanced by an assertive bitterness and bright hop aroma and flavor and comes in at 6.0% ABV. Alejandro Brown President/Head Brewer of Big Al Brewing had this to say about the project "We are proud to partner with Gorilla FC who share our passion for Seattle Sounders FC and our commitment to community. We look forward to raising many pints of Civ's White IPA and funds for local charities while supporting our beloved Sounders with this remarkable organization!"
Dick’s Brewing Company is also working with GFC and they have produced the Dick’s Au GFC. The Dick’s Au GFC is a Golden Ale brewed with American Two Row, Malted Wheat, and Magnum hops. The Au GFC is dry hopped with 3 distinct varieties; Saaz, Mt. Hood and Tettnanger. The first sip brings refreshing crispness with a slightly sweet malty aftertaste. The dry hop adds a nice floral and herbal backbone to the beer making it a great session beer with a 5.5% ABV. Julie Young, Owner and Dave Pendleton, Head Brewer of Dick’s Brewing Company said, “We are very excited working with GFC as we are huge football fans! We love supporting GFC’s charity activities and are happy we can do that through our beer.” Dick’s Au GFC is a play on the periodic table symbol Au for Gold and when being ordered go ahead and ask your bartender for an, A-U GFC!
Big Al’s Civ’s White IPA and Dick’s Au GFC will have a special release at four GFC partner bar locations on March 2nd, 2013 for Sounders first kick: Fado Irish Pub in Pioneer Square, Auto Battery Bar and The Summit Public House on Capitol Hill, and Naked City Brewery & Taphouse in Greenwood. Starting March 3rd you will be able to find these two beers around the Puget Sound area. Soccer is a cause for drinking, now you can drink for a cause with Big Al and Dick’s and GFC! The beers are available now at the two breweries.
On March 15, 2013, from 4:30 to 9 p.m., a release party for both beers will be held at Golazo Headquarters 714 E Pike, Seattle WA 98122. Meet the brewers, enjoy Big Al’s Civ’s White IPA and Dick’s Au GFC while listening to a live DJ. Media and public are welcome! Proceeds from the event will benefit Gorilla FC Charities.
Most Hollywood actors have their dirty little secrets on their IMDB pages. It's doubtful Tom Hanks is too proud of his starring role in the 1982 made-for-tv movie, "Mazes and Monsters." (I would be.) George Lucas has spent years basically suing everyone in the galaxy who's tried to share grainy VHS copies of the "Star Wars Holiday Special."
Hell even mega-hunk (as People magazine tells it) and current Best Actor Oscar nominee Bradley Cooper was in a SyFy original picture, "Midnight Meat Train" as recently as 2008.
These things happened. Try as you might, you can't erase the video evidence.
Why not embrace it? We all make mistakes, right? To err is human and all that jimmy jazz.
Throughout its now 18-year existence, our beloved American domestic top-flight soccer league, MLS has tried its darndest to pretend that the old NASL (North American Soccer League) never happened. Every now and then you'd hear a mention of the Tampa Bay Rowdies or Giorgio Chinaglia or the legendary "Soccer Bowls," but under the stewardship of Don Garber, the NASL and its free-spending (most likely cocaine-fueled) adventures were persona non grata inside MLS HQ.
In the words of Basil Fawlty, "Don't mention the NASL."
It's understandable. MLS and the NASL are two completely different sets of encyclopedias. Yes, they were both soccer leagues in America, but that's probably where the similarities end.
Riding the coattails of the 1994 MLS -- a league the Jim Romes of the world never expected to last -- has indeed planted roots across America and sustained. MLS has been in existence long enough that it has a history ... a history which should be embraced and celebrated.
Your Rhett Hardys, your Joe-Max Moore's, your Thomas Ravellis, your Doctor Khumalos, your Maruicio Cienfuegos... these players ought to be remembered, if not for their skills, but helping the league get off the ground. I'd go so far as to say Walter Zenga's backwards baseball cap should be bronzed outside Gillette Stadium.
MLS, maybe through no fault of its own, makes us forget these players or those gloriously cheesy games from the 1990s ever happened. Or that we once had teams called the Clash, the Wiz, the Burn and the MetroStars.
Why be embarrassed by this? The Brooklyn Dodgers were once known as the Bridegrooms, albeit in 1888, but a lot America sports teams and leagues had their warts growing up. (Ok, the MLS shootout from midfield was really dumb.)
Beyond that, any soccer fan in America -- if you've spent one second watching MLS -- has wasted time theorizing their own ways to improve it. From the pie-in-the-sky idea of promotion and relegation, to a single table, to playing games on the tradition FIFA calendar, there are never a lack of ideas to tweak the MLS format.
However here's a simple idea everybody in the MLS community can embrace.
Say it with me now:
MLS THROWBACK JERSEY NIGHT
Okay, okay, okay. This is dumb. This is pointless. Who cares?
Understandable viewpoints and it's highly unlikely such a thing could happen considering Nike made most of the original uniforms for MLS in 1996, whereas the league today is completely outfitted by Adidas. There are likely other legal entanglements, such as who owns the original logos and names. Plus people simply aren't as into the color teal as they were 15 years ago, sadly.
What would you even do with our dearly departed and mourned Tampa Bay Mutiny? (Maybe have a team play in Carlos Valderamma wigs?)
MLS can try to go about its business like the Red Bulls were never the NY/NJ Metrostars or that Sporting Kansas City didn't begin its life as the Wiz -- this probably makes sense in the big picture -- but why not do it for one special summer night, if only to boost ticket sales?
The NBA seems to do a retro/throwback thing every week, including the Miami Heat recently wearing their mid-1990s jams. (Available for a cool $89.99, mind.) Everybody seems to love when baseball teams breakout the power blue early 1980s double-knit pullovers. Even the NFL gets some mileage dusting off uniform designs from the days of leather helmets.
Yet MLS, which has tried to market itself as a savvy, hip league fails to do this? It's not like the current, cookie-cutter (read: bland) Adidas jerseys are flying off the rack's at Dick's Sporting Goods stores, are they?
Why not try this throwback idea out?
Sunil Gulati and Garber, you guys didn't get America another World Cup on our shores, this is the least you can do to make up for it.
And that's the thing, most people tend to love nostalgia. 1990s nostalgia is only now getting into high gear. Hell, last summer I did an entire series celebrating the decade of box-fades and bowl cuts. Mother-effing Kriss Kross is going to do a reunion show this summer.
The time is right.
Think about how much money could be made selling these retro shirts to hipsters or dopey high school kids in Vancouver Grizzlies snapback hats?
A veritable Todd Hoffman-approved gold mine!
You could make an entire night out of it and boost attendance in the lagging summer months without resorting to fireworks displays. It wouldn't cost that much to book the Spin Doctors to play before the game outside the gates or maybe hire one of the Quad City DJs to throw an postmatch after party. Get a couple people to ride around the concourses on rollerblades and -- BAM -- 90s Night. Hell, if you want to take it to the next level, sell Zima to all the hipsters who'll show up for $7 a bottle.
MLS Throwback Night seems like such a no-brainer, that obviously the league will never do it.
With that in mind, here's my unofficial ranking the best 1990s MLS jerseys from the original 10 clubs.
No. 10 -- Columbus Crew
Bake!
Yowzers, these are some hideous soccer costumes. Not even kitschy good, just out-and-out howlers.
That said, have the Crew ever in their history worn uniforms befitting of "Ameria's Hardest Working Team"? Columbus missed the mark when it failed to embrace the famous 1994 USMNT "denim kit" idea and make it uniforms looked like overalls to keep with the Crew's hard-working image.
Mustard yellow stripes? Pass.
No. 9 -- Colorado Rapids
Here's the thing about the thing, Celo.
Good move, at least for synergy, for the Stan Kroenke-owned Rapids to adopt a burgundy and powder blue color scheme of their fellow Altitude sports brethren, the Avalanche and the Nuggets, right? Actually, no the current Rapids scheme is pretty boring, not that the old set-up was all that more impressive, although the old logo at least reminded you of white water rafting and that senior trip Bayside High took.
The Rapids old dark green jerseys were relatively sharp, the ones pictured above are just ugly and nondescript, like some random college team.
Wouldn't be surprised if the Rapids tried another re-branding in the coming years.
No. 8 -- DC United
Marco Etcheverry's mullet is better than you.
In many ways the standard-bearer for MLS especially in the formative years, the DC United uniform scheme has stayed remarkably similar, much like the constant look on Bruce Arena's face that he just smelled a really wet and smelly fart.
The three stripes on the jersey was a little more distinctive that the current solid designs DCU rocks. A little more red in the mix wouldn't hurt. You know the Screaming Eagles or Barra Brava would be all about a throwback night.
No. 7 -- New England Revolution
Rock. Flag. Eagle.
The Revs have always had super lame jerseys. I blame Robert Kraft, naturally.
At least these old ones would look good with some fresh Reebok Shaq Attaq kicks.
(Sorry nodded off, looking at that Lalas picture made me go listen to a 45-minute Trey Anastasio guitar noodle, which is crazy since Lalas is admitted hair metal fan. Hard to find more disparate bands than Ratt and Phish.)
No. 6 -- New York/New Jersey MetroStars
AJ Soprano owned this poster.
Throughout their sorry existence, the MetroStars never had what you'd call a nice uniform, eventually settling on some bootleg AC Milan red-and-black striped scenario. If this post is worth anything, it'll start a movement to bring back the MetroStars 1930s art deco Cabbie mascot. That lil' guy had some heart!
The original white-and-black Juventus-knockoff kit NY/NJ rocked would be a marked improvement to the current Red Bull-branded ones. Does the Red Bull logo need to be so gigantic on the uniforms? They're bigger than Mike Francesa's ego ... almost.
We all get it, you're trying to sell an energy drink.
No. 5 -- Tampa Bay Mutiny
That's don't make 'em like this anymoooooore.
Lime green and powder blue jersey ... Slim Jim ad on the shorts ... horizontally-striped socks ... only in MLS ... or maybe one of Tampa Bay's many fine gentleman's clubs.
The Mutiny eventually settled on a pretty nice striped look, not that it matters since the club flooded in 2001.
#neverforget
No. 4 -- San Jose Clash
This shirt got me mad bitches, yo.
One of life's mysteries: why were the San Jose Clash represented graphically by a scorpion?
Call it 1990s trying to be "extreme" run amok. Not a bad-looking kit, overall. The home shirt holds up well.
The original Clash shirt, however? Guess they took the literal meaning of the word and applied it at the Nike shirt laboratory.
I'd quit Twitter, too, if this image of me was floating around.
Fun little aside. .... My father and I watched the inaugural MLS match back in 1996 together. It was DC United at the Clash on ESPN. Eric Wynalda scored the first league goal. My dad immediately nay-sayed DC United, basically calling them shit. I never let him forget this as United went on to win the league three of its first four seasons. Fun story, right?
No. 3 -- Dallas Burn
I once played for Real Madrid, but this is cool too.
Can I interest you in a jersey with not one but TWO fire-breathing hell-horses? That's what the initial Dallas Burn shirt featured, whoa nelly!
I guess people got tired of watching a team called THE BURN in 100-degree Texas heat every summer at the Cotton Bowl, hence FC Dallas was born. I still think a horse with lightning bolts for feet is a lot cooler than a longhorn for a logo, but that's me.
Eventually, in the days before that Beckham guy arrived, the Galaxy would settled on a unique yellow-and-green look with a sharp horizontal sash.
The initial Galaxy get up, however?
Whomever cooked those bad boys up must have watched a ton of Queen Latifah videos back in the day.
No. 1 -- Kansas City Wiz
Preki or Hugh Jackman? You make the call.
What can really be said of the 1996 Kansas City Wiz jerseys that hasn't been done so already?
The crown jewel of MLS hipster jersey collections.
Guarantee if you go on eBay and spend a couple hundred bucks on one of these and worn it out in public you'd have to beat the ladies away. This is Spanish Fly in jersey form ... or the exact opposite. All your money would get you is a greasy loser like me giving you a half-sneer, half-nod of approval.
In other words, you'd be a winner and a loser.
Bonus: Alexi Lalas Picture
I did NOT steal your Ugly Kid Joe CD, Vermes so knock it off.
Sporting Kansas City, you guys like the most progressive MLS team out there. As much as we all love the new look and name, bring back the Wiz or even the Wizards for one night.